Thursday 26 November 2020

god in me

I am somehow searching for the impossible 
Amongst the depths of the unknown
I hear a voice singing my name
However I can no longer figure it out on my own

I am somehow searching for the timid
The shy and the unbroken 
For what else can my soul desire 
So much so my mind wanders willingly ?

I am searching through the night 
Through the cloudless skies and stars 
I am looking for that spark of recognition 
To know that I have found the one

Yet is it love I seek so aimlessly
Is it my loneliness peeking through the blinds
Or is it my desperate urge to fit in with society 
To show even I deserve to have you by my side

Perhaps it is my ego wanting love 
To love and be loved and cherished beyond all
Yet is it so bad to yearn something so desperately 
That I can no longer name it as desire?

I breathe love out with breaths of want
I speak of love with honeyed words
My eyes are brimming with seeds
Sowed in to nourish someone with love

I am but a lost soul 
Wanting the full human experience 
I hear of soul mates and twin flames in this world 
How is it none of them desire me ?

Why is it, I cannot find this love I yearn
Why is it, I cannot find someone 
Who loves the same way I do
Do I not deserve love God?

Why is it you have me expecting for such love
Perhaps this love is meant for you only 
How selfish it is then don't you think my God?
To want all of me

Then have me as you will
Dance inside my heart the way you linger on my tongue 
Fill my being with your source
If it is my love you desire 

For I am made just like you. 
I am just as much as a God as you 
So if you want me to love you the same
Love me back more than I ever deserve .

The blood in me is yours
The soul in me is a fragment of yours
I am just as much as a figment of imagination 
That shouldn't exist in this world 

So do I all but exist for you 
The same way my prayers do for you ?
Will you worship me with the fervour I do
Will you love me with all of you ?

-3am


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