Sinew

I am in love with you to the point where im speechless
No words are needed
Nor can they prescribe
Well
I cant even fathom trying to explain this ache
It is a good ache
But painful nevertheless
Its in the center of my being
Right in between my chest
Its a ache that has nestled itself within sinew and bone
And made itself home
Its love
And im in love with you

If

And if i kill myself because im tired of being a failure
All ill do is leave you with memories
Thatll burn up with the rest of me

Hold still

Hold still,  my pretty little heart
Theyll never find you again
Hold still my broken little heart
We will be one once again

Hold still my precious little soul
Its okay if they wanted us no more
Hold still my broken little soul
Ill piece us back again once more

Hold still , runaway mind
Your thoughts are memories i cant describe
Hold still, my anxious little mind
Together, we shall once again thrive

Hold still, all these skeletons inside
Ill lock you up once again
Hold still, my skeleton of thoughts
Why do you bring so much pain?

Hold still, my body of mine
You shall betray no one but yourself
One day, someone will come, and love us
But maybe, until then, lets love ourselves

First

And there we were my love
In the early lights of the fading night
Your gleaming eyes, your mischievious smile
I was all yours just for the night

And there we were my love
All alone,my lips on yours
The taste of salt, lust and desire
Raging through my core

And i remember the feel of your hands my love
As they slowly tangled themselves in my hair
A tilt of a head, my hands bruising your hip
As our shirts were off with chests bare

You were a goddess in front of me
Kneeling against the soft covers as we looked eye to eye
I remember cupping your cheek, asking for your permission
As i then marked you as mine

I made sure you remembered my kisses love
And remembered the parts of you i loved
I bit and kissed and made sure to touch
The parts you that he didnt go back for

I remember when i was down there
And your eyes were half closed in pure bliss
Hearing you, watching you, tasting your essence
Were memories id never want to miss

And when i came back up for air again
And slowly crawled my way up over to you
Locked lips and tangled limbs
Somehow your hands still found their way through

We loved for a bit that night
But i made sure in the morning i loved you most
As you came again and again
I couldnt believe this was what i had missed out on

I hope you have no regrets my love
For i know you made it the best weekend of my life
Two days of just you beside me
I forgot what it was like to just live and smile

So i hope you read this one day
When you're down at night
That once upon a time there was someone who loved you
And the way we started at the beginning hours of the night

Broken souls

It was almost comical really
The way we fell into step right next to each other
Beside each other
And how our arms sought each other's hands
Gripping tightly
We maneuvered ourselves
Amongst the angry people
Amongst the stares and whispers

And i couldnt help but glance at you in that second
Where my arm was brushing against yours
Where i could smell you.
You. Just you
And i remembered stopping

Cupping your cheeks
And leaning in to kiss you
You were startled
Your lips were shaped in a soft 'o'
But you met my fierce kiss with a passion unlike other

And there we were
Two broken souls
Trying their best
To piece themselves together haphazardly

God

Why is it we praise god when something goods done
Why is it we curse god when misfortune befalls
Yet why do we tell people its because of god they succeeded
Then why dont we praise god when we are at our worst
Why do we remembee them at our best ?

Whats god but a memory of someone , you never saw, but heard stories of?
Stories passed down through generations
Books
Mouths and hands
And yet we give it the priority of utmost care
Here we are
A broken world

Not even just breaking but already ripped

And human lives are petty and weak and useless
Yet a non physical being gets our money our thoughts and food

And behind it we think were helping humanity
Whats god gonna do with all this money and food

Why do we try pleasing god
So god pleases us?
Didnt god make us?
I dont understand

The reasoning. The thoughts. The importance behind god.

Gay is evil
Its a sin
Why?

Because 2 people are loving each other without the inability to reproduce?

Why is it a sin if i choose to change my gender ?

Didnt god have a thousand forms he could change to?

Didnt god grow up with 2 male parents?

Irony

Hypothetically

Gods everything and nothing

Yet we praise God like no tomorrow

Wonder if God praises us

You saw

And you saw
In the corners of my smile
The darkness that lingered
Baby its been there for awhile

You knew
The winds of the storm i was trapped in
And when we laid in your bed, swaddled
As the storm came and swept you within

And i warned you
That i wanted you more than i ever had
And i knew your fears
Was wanting me a fear so bad?

Baby where are all the things ive worked for
Was it me or my body you wanted tonight
Baby was it my soul or my demons
That drove you further away from the light

I felt love today
When we moved together in a different way
And i heard whispers of words , that never made sense
For all i knew is that i loved you for today

My lifes been but a whisper
And your sinful hands have made me alive
I told god im sorry when i kissed you
For maybe this is why i never died

Ive been all over in a million places
And i took god and yet felt all alone
But i took you to one place and pieced myself
God im sorry but im in love